The Blog Everyone Has Been Asking For - the Diet (pt 3)

update- March 2021

this post is frequented a lot- here is an update- I moved back to Bham and over an 8 year period gained back all of the weight and more (Covid shutdown didn't help)- However, good news, I have lost 20 lbs since Dec 18 2020- slowly, and feel really good.

The low carb, austere diet works but is difficult to live with. Also, the body adjusts- I do credit great information from Noom- so I think I am doing it by a better way... but everything below is still the record in 2010- though I can't endorse everything below:

 Please see parts one and 2 as background info. In 2010 I lost more than 50 lbs and wanted to document what I did- this is an inside out change that must take place, over time.

FINALLY-…THE DIET…. THE PLAN…. THE PROCESS

(Ok- First let me say that Medi-Weightloss is the best choice here. It is expensive, and I was blessed by a benefactor on this- but I will give you how I would do it without the Medi personnel. But the Jan/Feb plan was my plan alone and medi came in April 16.)

JANUARY- Great time to think about a change. But you can do this at ANY time. Today is a good day.

For 1 month- do not think about doing a diet. Think about a paced and consistent exercise plan. This is a long process- get an improved state of fitness first.

DO NOT WEIGH YOURSELF- YOUR FIRST WEIGH IN WILL BE FEB 1

WATER- DRINK ONLY WATER FOR AT LEAST 3 WEEKS. You can still have coffee- but think about drinking only decaf after 9AM. No diet drinks for a while.

BREAKFAST- YOU MUST START EATING A GOOD BREAKFAST.

EATING 5 OR 6 TIMES A DAY.

Here is what Jan 2010 looked like for me.

Breakfast- Yogurt with pecans or walnuts, Fruit. (Don’t do a lot of bacon, eggs because you will get sick of those when you start the low carb phase.) I loved cream of wheat and Oatmeal on cold Jan morns.

Mid-morn- small apple or nuts- or 1/2 protein bar

Lunch- small salad

Mid-afternoon- apple or nuts or 1/2 protein bar

Evening- small portion meat and three (vegis) w/ glass of milk.

EXERCISE: YOU HAVE TO DO SOME SORT OF PHYSICAL ACTIVITY 5 0R 6 TIMES PER WEEK. It is Jan, so if the weather is the least bit good- get outside. If weather is bad do a gym workout. Vary what you do. I would run- walk- hike- treadmill-elliptical- Start slow. Try some of those workouts on your TV- they are good. Vary what you do.

JM Secret to Success- One exercise I really believe in is a straight arm squat- Start with a broom stick, and hold it high with 2 hands and straight arms over your head and do 10 full squats holding the broom stick over your head with straight arms. Work up to 3x10 and do it twice a week. Add weight slowly. Do not go over 45 lbs.

I got to where I was doing the bar (45 lbs) 3x10 with really good technique. It did wonders for my core!

Do this for 1 month. Pray that God will remove the idol of food. Try not to binge, but if you do- just come back the next day.

The Goal of Month #1 is to build a fitness base. You are eating and drinking water to fuel your body as a workout machine.

FEBRUARY: This is a short month.

Day 1: Weigh In on a good scale- one that you will use a lot. No cheap bathroom scale. One great tool I used was Wii Fit- it was a good scale and keeps the record for you.

Psych Prep- Before you weigh… you cannot worry about that number. Your mind will play tricks on you throughout the process. Today is a beginning- you are worth more than what a scale says about you.

Goal: Keep improving in exercise and eat consistently good choices. Begin to limit portions from time to time. Eat slowly and enjoy it- enjoy the company more than the food. Add multi-vitamin-multi-mineral.

Exercise- get outside as much as possible. Pick one day a week to go long and hard. Vary the workouts and be smart. An injury or bad tendonitis will set you back. Listen to your body. Stretch.

As the weather gets better- learn to praise God as you run and revel in the glory of nature!

March: Spring Break is coming and you will need a break. Do 1 week normal. The week before spring break try to eat the least you have eaten the whole year. Feel some hunger pains and try to drown them with water or decaff coffee. Don’t skip meals- just cut the portions back.

Spring break- Take the week off- run or walk only for fun.

If you have a week after spring break- get back into an exercise routine.

THE OFFICIAL DIET BEGINS IN APRIL! THE CRUELEST MONTH.

APRIL: This is the serious time- time to go for it! YOU CAN DO THIS!

Week 1: 800 calories and no more than 20 carbs. You are going to be miserable for about 4 days.

Almost like you have the flu. Exercise will be really hard, but try to do it even though you will do less.

WATER/WATER/WATER- Smart water for electrolytes (64-128 fluid oz)

EAT all 800 calories and try to keep it about 5 carbs per meal.

Buy some ketostix at pharmacy and test for ketosis- you want to get in ketosis by day 3 (turn it moderate at least) and you want to be in ketosis for about 45 continuous days.

YOU MUST WRITE DOWN OR RECORD ON YOUR SMART PHONE TO KEEP UP WITH THE CALORIE COUNT (there are great apps for this - I use 'daily burn' but there are other good ones. )

Here is a sample day for me:

Breakfast-eggs/bacon/sausage with cheese

Snack- 3 cubes of cheese

Lunch- Grilled chicken breast (2)

Dinner- Grill a BIG steak and eat fat and all

If you do not drink a ton of water- you will have a hard time with BM’s. You may want to slowly add some benefiber. But  don’t be shocked if you go 2 or 3 days without a BM once you hit this phase.

JM Success Secret- The Ketosticks will excite you- a dark color means you are burning fat. Weigh every 3 days. You might drop 9-15 lbs in 1 week- but it is mostly water weight. BTW- You will pee non stop for about 2 weeks. And enjoy grilling meat- eat fish- big ham- pork chops- ribs- lavishly eat red meat. Eat big omelets.

Things that will save you: Hot sauce- 0 carbs- Mustard.

Week 2- 800 calories and slowly add more carbs but try to stay in ketosis- Dark green vegis and almonds. Do not go over 30 carbs a day in week 2.

One thing that really helped me was the internet- you can google almost any food and get the nutritional info.

Some huge finds:

Kroger has a yogurt called Carbmaster- 80 cals and 4 grams of carbs- it is cheap and tastes great!

Almonds were my survival food- 24 nuts is 170 cal and 5 carbs

One thing I noticed was that my body adjusted by week 2 to the exercise- I was running fairly well on No carbs- Why? No idea- but it worked fine for me.

Week 3- I had my first challenges with eating out;

A lot of Salads- no croutons- and I tried to eat just ½ of it.

Hot wings and side salad kept me in ketosis

Now by week 3- I was totally hooked and in the zone-

Start- 246.6

Week 1- 237

Week 2- 231.4

Week 3- 228.2

I was feeling great and rolling.

Around weeks 4 or 5, I began trying more calories and exercising harder. I would eat a ½ apple with peanut butter about an hour before running. Grapes tasted like candy.

I felt the best and kept the stick dark with 1200 cal and 35 carbs a day.

I added a few treats- Soy milk with Stevia if I ran well that day

I found a 9 carb bread and did a few ½ sandwiches and burgers

I stayed in Ketosis from day 3 to day 48. And lost 29 lbs in 45 days.

On Monday, I will post how to transition off and some thoughts about maintenance.

The Blog Everyone Has Been Asking For.... (part 2)

 The next few days I am going to document how I lost over 50 lbs in 2010- this is what worked for me- but it begins with 26 years of failure. I hope you are encouraged. Because there is some background here- let me give you the January goal- don't diet yet- eat normal- but SLOWLY begin to get your body in shape. Fuel your body while you build cardio endurance, muscular strength, and flexibility. Your strict diet will not begin until April- so gear your mind for a LONG process and it will happen.

Psychological and Spiritual Factors in Weight Loss:

I need to address the most crucial of all the weight loss factors in my struggle. Losing weight begins on the INSIDE. I have to admit there are some idolatry issues in this. Food can be a powerful idol, it combines with a longing for comfort and desire to be filled. My quest for taste and fullness, pleasure and excess, with no regard for my body as a temple is a huge deal here.

And these idols are so deeply seated in my heart that I am still very much in danger to be lured and trapped yet again.

I remember the horror of reading Philippians 3:18,19 ( For many walk, of whom I often told you, and now tell you even weeping, that they are enemies of the cross of Christ, whose end is destruction, whose god is their appetite, and whose glory is in their shame, who set their minds on earthly things.) and knowing that was describing me.

The beauty of the gospel was that over time, I was able to say – “Lord, this is me. My only hope is You. I trust in Your death to cover me and the truth of the gospel message to set me free.”

And yet this was a 20 year seemingly unanswered prayer- but I say again and again. The big things- the important things- take decades in God’s timing. You must search Him out and wait and wait and wait- and be willing to be content that His delivery comes at a much different timetable than we can see. But He is faithful.

There are psychological tricks here as well. One is Human Apperception.

In psychology, apperception is "the process by which new experience is assimilated to and transformed by the residuum of past experience of an individual to form a new whole."  In short, it is to perceive new experience in relation to past experience.

Example:

A rich child and a poor child walking together come across the same ten dollar bill on the sidewalk. The rich child says it is not very much money and the poor child says it is a lot of money. The difference lies in how they apperceive the same event – the lens of past experience through which they see and value (or devalue) the money.

    —Christopher Ott            (source wikipedia)

They way this impacted me was the man in the mirror. I would gain 5 or 10 lbs and look at myself and feel disgust or anger or shame or hurt. Then I would lose 5 lbs and see myself in the mirror and feel such victory.The view was always an extreme; a warped stretch of the reality.

Photographs disturbed me more than the mirror. Someone would show me a picture of me and I would feel so bad about how heavy I looked. A year or so later, I would feel the same pain at a new photo and look at last years and wonder why I couldn’t at least look like last year.

The amazing difference was in '10 year' pictures. I would look at an old picture (that I previously thought was disgusting) and long for being that way again.

All of this though was a sinful human heart being swayed by my sinful and tainted senses. For example: if my wife told I looked good, my image was accepted and I was OK. If she told me I had gained weight, it pushed me into that dark hole.

It is important to remind ourselves that we are not regarded by others in these extremes. I rarely notice the weight change on others and in the long run, I don't care. If you are reading this right now, don't feel bad about how you look. You are you- people know you as you are- and though we think that appearance is something that indicates acceptance or rejection, it is never as important as we think. A warm smile and bright eyes and a loving spirit shows through way more than what your body shape is. Stop beating yourself up.

Without sounding 'hokey'- I also sensed that the enemy used quiet heart whispers to further push the pain. There is a demonic part to the inner voices that say, “You’ll never defeat this” or “You’re just a pig” or “How can you say you glorify God when your temple is a wreck”. Those thoughts were darker and deeper that just my heart. How that works, I just don’t know. I don’t think it is Satan himself, but the dark forces of evil tend to do these types of whisper campaigns to torture believers.

About 3 years ago, I began to become more aware of these battles and began to confront them. As I began to feel some small victories and growing in confidence, the battle pressed harder. I had some vicious attacks come through false accusations, misunderstandings, gossip, and deadly rumors. 

But God kept picking me up and I began to fight consistently and well. Not in words so much as in deep prayer and positive attitudes. When the battle was really raging I would get up each morning and say: “No matter what the devil or world throws my way today- I will rejoice- I am a son of the King of the universe- Jesus Christ my Lord loved me- He died for me- I am a blessed man- I am overflowing with joy, hope, and love.”

I also would begin to pray for people who were being used in attacks toward me. I wasn’t growing bitter toward them. The largest victory came when I was so full of mercy at those who misunderstood or disliked me. I felt true love for them. I prayed for their health, I spoke well of them to others, I looked to serve them, and when they wounded me, I copied my Lord’s prayer “Father forgive them, they know not what they do”. Now please, I did not do this perfectly… I got angry, at times, in the fight, I slipped at times, I accepted that I sometimes deserved the attacks- But the Holy Spirit deserves ALL THE CREDIT- as I began to get better in this fight.

I wrote some blog postings during March of 2010. It captures a lot of what I learned in this three year concentrated and intense spiritual battle. I encourage you to spend some time in these if you have experienced some of these same feelings of shame and disappointment in yourself. Remember that you will suffer tribulation in this world and learn how to keep your joy in spite of circumstances.

Ok I have taken a long time talking about this ‘philosophy stuff’.

But I have to reiterate all of this. Do you see the long buildup? Do you see the deed seated roots of this problem? Do you understand it is not just physical? It is not so simple to say:’Oh well just stop eating and exercise'- and it is offensive when a thin person asks if you want to lose weight and you say yes and then they say "Push that fat butt away from the table."

Also- without the life changing, Holy Spirit given, gospel message- what hope do we have? 

Jesus loves me- fat or thin. His death covers all of my failings and sin. Can you embrace that? It is hard… so many people say “I just can’t accept that- it seems too easy” but my friend I am crying to you again- YOU CANNOT EARN GOD”S FAVOR. YOU CANNOT BE GOOD OR DISCIPLINED. YOU CANNOT DO GOOD WORKS AND GO TO HEAVEN.

It is a sheer gift- we call it grace. 

I could care less if this inspires you to lose weight. My desire is for all of us to fall on our knees and cry out to the God of mercy and say to Him: LORD- I give this to You! You are God! You are in control. Take this… take me.. I cannot do any good. If you marked my sin or counted it against me- I am in trouble- But YOU LOVE ME- your death proves it- your resurrection validates Your sacrifice. My only hope is Christ. In Christ alone- I have FAITH in HIM- I trust HIM- I don’t even understand how it all works- but I lay every thing I have- my life- my eternity- my affections on Him. 

And when it is all through- at the end of the day- what I just did is by HIM TOO! What a God! What a Savior! How can I not proclaim this to the world! What a message!

Finally- the fruit of this latest victory came at the exact right time. It was God's timing. He got me ready for it. And now I see that He had a BIG reason for giving me this victory after 26 years of failing.

So I will list it out like this:

STEP 1- SPIRITUAL GROWTH.. I began to apply the Word more, pray more, and fight

STEP 2- RELEASING FEAR AND PAIN FROM DAILY LIFE..The realization of this was when in 2009  we finished 3-7 in football. I can't remember a time that this had ever happened to me. Every coach in America fears these types of years.

But, it was a blessing to understand that I'M OK- I DID NOT DIE!. Instead of running to food and poor self esteem I actually found a huge desire to get better.

I stood in front of the new group of seniors in Jan of 2010 and said “Watch me- you are going to see me change- I am going to work and compete- follow my lead” and I began to take it day by day- but I was determined to be the hardest working person on our campus- and I went after it mentally, physically, and spiritually. It felt good to fight! Everyday as I ran, all I did was to pray for those seniors... I wanted them to have a great year and I wanted to lead everyone I could by my example.

STEP 3- CELEBRATING SMALL VICTORIES- I did not gain weight during the 2009 season- which was significant.It did not dawn on me until after my meeting with the rising seniors.

STEP 4- FACING THE REALITY OF POOR HEALTH – I knew my blood pressure was growing and my wife kept up her concern- this was a silent killer- and what would my family do?

STEP 5- GETTING INTO THE ROUTINE- I had a good exercise routine going- I was finally healthy enough to run without pain and smart enough to know how to pace myself and cross train. (Take days off, do elliptical training,swim, ride a bike on sunny days). I was also smart to not start a diet in January. I decided to let my body get in shape for a month.I needed to fuel my workouts. The plan was to get an initial weight in Feb and begin to slowly change eating habits. I started with breakfast every morning, a lot of water, and eating 5 or 6 small meals a day. I did this Feb and March and I lost about 10 lbs.

GOD'S MIRACLE  –In April 2009- Out of the blue- one of my best friends – inspired, persuaded, and sponsored  me to join Medi-Weightloss in Brentwood in April- it was a perfect time of year to begin the journey. I can't say enough of what he did for me. I hope I have the means one day to do this for someone else.

The other things had to have taken place for this to work. But I do know that my commitment to not let my friend down and the great plan at Medi was huge. I will talk more about what I learned from them tomorrow.

From March 15- June 30- I lost an additional 39 lbs. The fun part was that as the days got warmer and I saw real weight coming off, I got great motivation to keep going. When I finally had my metabolism and eating right I was losing about 2-4 lbs a week.

Without the gospel- without the timing- without all of the above- it would have been a waste of time. Please see that this is a process- a long time… a lot of failure. Then, at the perfect moment, God takes over- HE IS NEVER LATE- BUT HE IS RARELY EARLY.

Tomorrow I am going to share a ‘diet’ plan.

The Blog Everyone Has Been Asking For.... (part 1)

The next few weeks I am going to document how I lost over 50 lbs in 2010- this is what worked for me- but it begins with 26 years of failure. I hope you are encouraged. Because there is some background here- let me give you the January goal- don't diet yet- eat normal- but SLOWLY begin to get your body in shape. Fuel your body while you build cardio endurance, muscular strength, and flexibility. Your strict diet will not begin until April- so gear your mind for a LONG process and it will happen.

 My Life Long Weight Struggle and Recent Success

Intro: I have had a losing battle with weight for 26 years. I guess I have had a food issue since I was very young. I had the typical 'teen skinniness' helped by a lot of sports and I even was underweight during the spring of my senior year.

But the look of my body did not tell an accurate picture.

#1- Even though I was an athlete- I really did not train/eat/hydrate properly. I can’t say enough how I would like to see what it would have been like to go through our football program today ( and even if I could last). Coach Ryan McSwain has developed the best strength and conditioning program I have ever seen.

But my life as a football player does have distinct weights recorded in my brain, so I can track the decline. I tried my hardest to gain weight during my high school football days to no real avail. (Now I know that I just did not know how to really do it right. Gaining weight is EXERCISE and eating more of the good stuff- losing weight is EATING and exercise with the bold words being the most important and hardest.)

My senior year (fall) I had pushed it up to a whopping 165 lbs! But I remember weighing around March that same year and because I had stopped lifting (and in those days it meant bench, incline bench, and arm curls for the girls) and had withered to a very puny 150.

Then something strange happened- I hit the ‘man’ phase. I am not talking about puberty…. But there is something different that happens when a boy hits that 18-21 year old body. You see it most commonly as a boy moves from his Jr to Sr year. I still regret that I was so young for my grade. I was an August birthday. (I did not turn 16 until the summer of my Junior year and some of my classmates had been driving as freshmen.)

It started when I spent the entire spring semester at the Sports Medicine and Fitness Institute as an exercise technician and getting school credit as part of the Birmingham School System Executive High School Internship Program (that was a mouthful. Basically, I worked and they just gave me A’s in all my spring classes).

At SMFI, I began to work a little harder. Russ Polhemus was the first one to push me more distance running. I had never been over a mile. He gradually built me up to 4 or 5 miles. He also began getting me more consistent on a total body weight lifting program- squats ,cleans, lat pulls..etc.

In May or June, I decided to walk-on at Alabama and remember stepping on a scale at SMFI the next day and I weighed 178 lbs! I was pumped. But it is that man thing, even without SMFI I would have gained a lot of that. (OH! to have played my Senior year at 185 lbs.. it would have been sweet!)

My first day at Alabama I weighed in at 185.

Now, I loved my time at Alabama. I wish now I had been a little tougher and ‘big picture minded’ and I totally did my summers wrong (note to all college athletes- go to summer school and lift with the team in the strength coach’s program, yes it is hard, but you cannot do it better alone).

But to live as a college athlete means developing some habits that you have to transition out of or you are in TROUBLE.

Here’s what I mean:

#1 EATING- When I started eating at Bryant Hall, my guess is that I began consuming about 3,000 calories per meal. And listen, I was a world class eater! From my 7/8 year old days until now, I never had anything left on my plate after a meal. That has been a mental cue for me in this latest battle. (When I go out to eat now I will leave food on my plate and call it a victory. I also want to split a meal with my wife when we go out and still leave food on my plate.)

Those ladies at Bryant Hall could cook. They were the sweetest women I have ever known in my life and they loved stuffing us like turkeys. We had mandatory breakfast, gourmet lunches, and dinner for Kings. I had the pleasure of making the ‘Scout team training table’ every week under Coach Ray Perkins and had Steak, Shrimp, and occasional Lobster all the time!

We then had 10PM snacks. I would eat 2 or 3 sandwiches made with this peanut butter and honey mixture- chocolate milk.

#2 EXERCISE- All the eating was burned either in football or worse the dreaded off-season workouts (which just about killed me, but was really the first time in my life that I truly worked).

I remember my first off-season with Coach Al Miller. Because of a quirk in my school schedule, I had the 6AM weightlifting shift on MWF and the running shift on Tues/Th afternoons. I could do the running- I ran high school track, so 200’s, 400’s, 800’s and mile runs were no problem. The fact that he put us on the stopwatch was a problem because it meant I couldn’t fake one or loaf.

But those 6AM weight workouts….. we would lift 3 sets of 10 (and parallel squats 3x10 will make you wish you had never been born) based on a 10 rep max. But after a while- you did 3x10 OF YOUR 10 rep max!

This is the honest truth….. I woke up one morning around 3:30 AM. My legs were so sore and in such pain that I began crying… and then I realized I had to workout in about 21/2 hours. It was the single most period of dread in my entire life. But I survived. I even remember pushing through and actually making every rep.

(Now this is way too long and I’m the only one who I’m doing this for) but one last note- I wish I had handled my down time better at Alabama. I made my grades, etc. But I used a 'woe is me, tired dog attitude'- to allow me to lay around and rot way too much. I would have adjusted fine to what I was doing if I had rested a little, studied, and gotten out and done fun things, more activities, more people oriented things. That was a habit forming thing too.)

OK- the problem was not when I was playing. Bryant Hall eating plan and Al Miller’s death camps resulted in me getting to 195… muscled, lean, and fast. Not nearly good enough to actually play at Alabama, but I could go toe to toe in practice and feel really good about myself.

Then…. I stopped the playing, I quit the exercise… but I kept the eating.

In the late Spring of 1984, I accepted Coach Perkins’ generous offer to become a Student Resident Assistant at Bryant Hall which paid room and board. That meant I was no longer a football player.

In one year’s time, I went from 195 lb’s of muscle to 212 lb’s of out of shape sluggishness. I distinctly remember putting on my sweat pants one morning and realizing that they fit way too snug. I went over to the athletic complex and weighed… 212! I was in shock. It was the first in a series of these deep gut feelings of disappointment and shame.

I went out to the fields and began jogging. Alabama was in spring drills and Coach Perkins asked a trainer who was jogging around the field. He said “Jay Mathews” and Coach Perkins told the trainer to go over and tell me I had gotten fat.

I’m peddling along.. and this trainer jogs over to me. “Coach Perkins sent me over here to tell you that you have gotten fat.”

So from 1984 until Jan 2010 (26 years), I had had an ache of feeling this complex variety of feelings, moods, small successes, and bitter defeats with weight gain.

One quick note- I don’t look at that trainer’s comment or Coach Perkins in any ill way. At the time, it hurt, because I knew it was true. It wasn’t said in a mean way. It was just a brute fact. One more interesting note- I don’t know why (and this isn’t 100% - but it is 85-90%)- but former football skill players, backs, Qb’s tend to get fat after their playing days and Linemen tend to trim down. I have said for years, backs get fat. And they do.

My freshman year at Alabama, Major Ogilvie returned to watch a practice. I worshipped that guy! At the end of practice, Coach Bryant called him over to talk to the team. Coach Bryant mumbled something about Major being a ‘Helluva back’ but now would have to play guard and we all laughed. But even then I noticed that Major just chuckled and now I know what he felt that day.

 For the record: 1984 (212)- 1987 (I lost down to 205)- 1988 ( I got married at 218)-

1991 ( I remember getting up to 225 and sometime around 1993 or 94 I lost back to 218 again). But in 1991 I started coaching football which was a general run of gaining 10 lbs during the season and losing 5 in the off season.

1995- 225 net            1996-2003 – fluctuated between 228 and 231- I remember being so appalled at anytime I pushed 230 that I would starve myself for a few days.

I also remember doing Atkins at some point twice and weight watchers once.

Atkins the first time- huge early success 15 lbs off in no time. But I never transitioned right and my wife despised it (fatty red meat and no volume reduction).. so it fizzeled.

The 2^nd time I was in my 30’s and I was undergoing some big digestive changes biologically- I spent 2 or 3 years getting diverticulitis twice and having to be hospitalized for 3 or 4 days. Atkins #2 led to a colitus bout and I dumped it again.

Issues with my experience of Atkins- your body has a nasty rebound. Once you swear off bad carbs, it means you should not go back in my opinon.

Weight watchers makes a lot of sense- you have a limit- you can have more volume if the food is better. But it is a lot of counting- no real commitment to exercise or food restrictions- and I found myself going to meetings with all women and feeling way out of place.

2004- my mom passes away, I change jobs, move to Nashville, take stress and pressure to food comfort- keep exercising (in fact I am a much harder exerciser now than ever in my 20’s or 30’s)- but I slowly kept the plus 10 minus 5 decline.

Somewhere between 2007 and 2008 I hit 245 for the first time and it about shocked me to death. I had been doing some heavy weight lifting and felt healthy and strong… yikes!

2008 had a physical and my doctor told me I had one last chance to get my weight and blood pressure down- I was borderline to going on blood pressure medication. I weighed 248 that day.

The winter of 2008 I am afraid that I got in the high 250’s- none of my clothes fit.

Jan of 2009 I had a good new year’s resolution start and dropped down to 238.

I went into the football season of 2009 at 242.

And that season was the first break of a 26 year cycle and movement to real change.

Next post: psychological and spiritual factors and how I begin to see real change

A Christmas Blessing....Don't Miss It...this year

Set your mind right now to not let this season of blessing slip by. Take it and squeeze out every drop... Thanks again to Eugene Peterson:

Psalm 128-A Pilgrim Song

 1-2 All you who fear God, how blessed you are!

how happily you walk on his smooth straight road!

   You worked hard and deserve all you've got coming.

      Enjoy the blessing! Revel in the goodness!

 3-4 Your wife will bear children as a vine bears grapes,

      your household lush as a vineyard,

   The children around your table

      as fresh and promising as young olive shoots.

   Stand in awe of God's Yes.

      Oh, how he blesses the one who fears God!

 5-6 Enjoy the good life in Jerusalem

      every day of your life.

   And enjoy your grandchildren.

      Peace to Israel!

How can anyone say that the way is smooth and straight? Isn't Christianity so hard it is painful? No my friend, being a Christian is easy- being an unrepentant sinner is hard.

HH Farmer- go against the grain of the universe and you will get splinters.

J.H. Newman (paraphrase): "If I want to travel north and all the roads are cut to the east, of course I will complain of the roads. I will find nothing but obstacles;I will have to surmount walls, and cross rivers- never finding the end- only failure. So it is with all who seek happiness for their own end- the signposts to Zion are well marked- but we ignore them and stubbornly bushwack our own way. Of course we will meet thwartings, and disappointments, and failure- then we get mad at God for making it so hard- religion is an inconvenience only to those who are going against the compass-."

The above Psalm is just one of the many ways I have experienced the pouring out of mercy by the Holy Spirit this Christmas season. John Calvin used to press his congregation to pursue deeper happiness- seeking the pleasure that goes beyond the world's standard of ease, honor, and great wealth.

So this morning I am reveling in God's great YES. The last few days I have been able to see how blessed I am. The wife He has given me- the children of joy that light my heart with life- the beautiful friends who love me- my extended family who pray faithfully. For one whole week I have been able to retreat from the contrary winds of the pilgrim life and soak in the peace and warmth of God's riches- this is a blessing of Christmas.

My friends- I am calling out to all- right now in your heart see that Christ is right here- He is right there- He has NEVER forsaken you- and He holds no grudge for our ignoring Him- look deep inside and say to Him right now- 'THANK-YOU- Lord, help me sip the wine of your sweet gift this Christmas'.

 The gift is not because we are good- I am a great sinner-the gift is because HE IS GOOD.

At that very moment of that prayer, He begins to pull out the splinters and salve your hurting heart. And you will SEE His provision all around you.

JOY, which was the small publicity of the pagan,

is the GIGANTIC SECRET of the Christian

                           G.K. Chesterton

Hug those who are with you and bask in the riches of His love- MERRY CHRISTMAS!

And let's all walk on that smooth well-worn path of blessing- all the way to Zion!

 

Re-post "Walking through Wounds"

This is always such an amazing time of year. It is a chance for reflection.
I took a long time today in my blog: www.jayopsis.blogspot.com and re-read years of journal entries and posts.
This one is from Dec 1- 2008. God's truth is still as true today as it was then. I know this sounds crazy- but I am doing great and have had Christmas cheer all day today. Isn't God good!

Walking Through Wounds With Joy and Hope

Life wounds….. there is no getting around it. It isn’t always tragic, it sometimes just pricks like a thorn. But it’s those little tears that can add up the most. Life lets you down.

I want to thank Bill Delvaux for opening a window to explore this, because it is these hurts that point us eventually toward heaven and it is pain that inexplicably keeps the heart alive.

Life is often a series of disappointment: Robert Frost correctly asserted that ‘nothing Gold can stay’- even the good moments are fleeting and drift away in slivers. I always thought it was appropriate that Pip experienced all the shock of seeing his world collapse in “Great Expectations”.

“All the truths of my position came flashing on me; and its disappointments, dangers, disgraces, consequences of all kinds, rushed in in such a multitude that I was borne down by them and had to struggle for every breath I drew.”

But it was the subtle letdowns that he noticed first:

My (new) clothes were rather a disappointment, of course. Probably every new and eagerly expected garment ever put on since clothes came in, fell a trifle short of the wearer's expectation.

A big part of Christian maturity is accepting the ‘beautiful letdown’ as a reality that does not dampen joy or hope.

The apostle Paul makes this point vividly clear in Roman 8:18 “ For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us. 19 For the creation waits with eager longing for the revealing of the sons of God. 20 For the creation was subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of him who subjected it, in hope 21 that the creation itself will be set free from its bondage to corruption and obtain the freedom of the glory of the children of God. 22 For we know that the whole creation has been groaning together in the pains of childbirth until now. 23 And not only the creation, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies. 24 For in this hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? 25 But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.

26 Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. 27 And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because [6] the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. 28 And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good…”

But it is not an easy lesson to learn. It must be experienced by faith over time. It means silent suffering and patient endurance. It really is like birth pangs that ebb and flow with variations of intensity.

I have had my share of deep hurts.. including the loss of my mom.

But it is the subtle wounds that can exasperate, partly because they send mixed messages. Is God angry with me? Is this deserved discipline? Is He protecting me?

I look back over old notes regarding a time in my life where I sought a head coaching job. I ended up being the runner up four times in a row! My reactions were all over the place… sometimes anger, sometimes laughter.

Look at some of my former journal entries:

2002
There has always been a cry inside of me. It’s hard to describe exactly, something akin to a hunger. It throbs and fluctuates, groaning to be born. But it always stops. I am somewhat afraid of it…is this the evil part of me? Is it an unquenchable thirst for pleasure and self-satisfaction that wants to destroy all the good intentions of my creator?
I am afraid because I know it is tied to my ego- that part of me that wants to matter, to be noticed, to be applauded as the winner of whatever race I am in. Is it evil? Does it miss the mark- what the English termed a sin?
I am also afraid because it may turn out to be a sham. Some wild excuse to sound pseudo-philosophical and be nodded to by the brilliant. It is so funny, I am a roller coaster between self-assertion and self-denial, self-confidence and self-condemnation…. and now I chastise myself for self-absorption.
I have lived long enough now to have more questions than answers. I have read the great writers and realized that I can’t even read, much less write. I have heard the great preachers, and realized I can’t hear. I have mulled over the great thinkers and realized I can’t think. The only really good thing I do is forget.
Then I soothe myself by finding someone lower than me, only to realize that I perceive him to be lower, I can see no farther into him than he can into me. So what is my premise?
I am glad I am not a mathematician or a scientist. I am glad I am not a lawyer or a doctor. Lord knows we need all of these. I am glad I am not a mechanic, or a plumber, or an accountant, but I am glad my wife is an accountant.
I am glad to be me. I enjoy appreciating the dull things. I do love life and all in all it is an easy one. There is a part of me afraid of God. Afraid that He will look down at me one day and say, “suffer”. I know there is pain a comin’- death of loved ones (update mom passed away in Jan 2004, brother in drug rehab 2004). I feel a knee twinge now, or get a gas pain in my side, or have heart burn and I pause..”is this cancer? A heart attack? Arthritis? Lou Gherig’s disease?” Then I pause again and say, “What a poor view of my Father I have”. God design is not zapping people out of their mirth; it is getting me to trust Him enough to ascend the mountain of His pleasure.
But I’m writing today to say that I fell trapped. I am a gold fish swimming so hard against the edge of the bowl that I am fagged out- (thanks for letting me reclaim the term). I am punching against golden puppet threads and am tangled. I see the air on my gauge at critical, but am too far under the surface to survive. And so I am crying out.
I do not want to be cut loose from my wife or my girls. I do not want away from my Lord. But I need to get away from this sanctuary. I have been too safe for too long. It feels so good to lie here and soak, but I’m afraid that if I stay too long I will lose my desire to ever move again. I’m too young to pull in my reins and rest. Will I then find I have saved all I have, risked nothing, but never gained anything?
So how do I approach this? How does God’s sovereignty fit in with my knack for manipulation and coercion? Can I push so hard that I go where God cannot bless me? Do I sit back and find I never arrived where He could use me? One has faith to sit and wait – am I showing faith by swatting every gnat in my eye?
I am discovering that the truth of God that states that He put eternity in my heart (Ecclesiastes) can feel sometimes like a curse- it is a madness that tortures me. So I am crying to you- Oh my Father- get me out or take me out or take out that part that wants out….just please help…. I am not demanding…. I am begging and it probably sounds like a whimper.


It is now more than 6 years later… and I see God’s purposes more clearly. But I am still a man who hurts… cut me and I still bleed.

Losses still hurt…. Arguments still frustrate…. Rejection still wounds me.

But I am more able to at least say, “Blessed be the name of the Lord”.

I see that the granting of tears, teaches compassion. Ravi Z is right, I will feel no passion to change until I feel the pressure in my own soul. There are seasons- A time to laugh and a time to cry- My prayer is that we always show compassion and love first- it is actually more important that the truth that comes later?

The question will come: Why?

There are a lot of wrong answers to the question of wounds and a few wrong responses to these happenings. I don’t have time to go into it in detail- but there is a growing Heresy within the evangelical church that is a new spin in age old unbiblical answers to these issues.

These heretics are not bad people- but unfortunately are giving advice that sounds good to the human ear, but really offers no real hope- in fact, in the end it robs them of a path to true recovery.

So hear me very clearly-God is great and God is good/ Great in that He is in control- He ordains these dark times and will use them to His glory. The very second you say that God is not in control, you began to rob Him of His Godness and you begin to believe that He is not trustworthy.

A surprising help to me is Psalm 107
Let the redeemed of the Lord say so- what is the so? Oh Give thanks to the Lord for He is good, for His steadfast Lord endures forever. Whom He has redeemed from trouble.

4-9 Some wandered- became hungry and thirsty- He led to straight way satisfies the longing. All of us are wanderers.
10-16 Some sat as prisoners- shadows of death- for they rebelled- example of substance abuse - you cannot escape- there are all kinds of dependency- the heart of the addict.
17-22 Some foolish- sowing and reaping-
23-32 Some just experienced storms of life- not making the team/ injury/ sickness
33-42- The general providence of God- divorce/bankruptcy/cancer/crime/ school authority and decisions of those in authority

Hear the promises in this Psalm:
Cry to the Lord and He delivered
Thank Him for His steadfast love
He satisfies- He fills the hungry
He brings them out of the shadow of death
He breaks the bonds- shatters iron and bronze bars
He delivers from distress
He sends His word and heals them
He delivers from destruction
He controls nature
He prospers
He shuts the mouth of the wicked


43- Attend to these things- consider the steadfast love- and SAY SO

TELL OTHERS OF HIS GOODNESS- EVEN IN THE MIDST OF PAIN.

IF YOU CAN HURT AND STILL PRAISE THE LORD…. YOU ARE REALLY LIVING!
IF YOU CAN HURT AND SERVE OTHERS… YOU ARE REALLY CARING!
IF LIFE CAN LET YOU DOWN AND YOU STILL FEEL JOY AND HOPE… YOU ARE REALLY READY FOR HEAVEN!


And here I am 2 years later- And I can fully say LET THE REDEEMED OF THE LORD SAY SO- I WILL SAY HE IS GREAT AND HE IS GOOD! AMEN!

This One Will Be Strange

OK- here we go-.... inspired by Eugene Peterson

Look at me- you laugh and I laugh. But it is too convoluted to sort out.

YOU LAUGH
So I realize now that the way God cares is so alien.... it is his strange ministers that make up His HOLINESS. He does seem intolerable careless about my scars and crosses- but He should be. Things I tremble at, He just shakes His head. Do I really know of loneliness and pain? 'Come on' He says, "Give me a break. Your powder puff- magic dragon God of expediency does not exist".

"But I get so tired of constantly defending You against the cynics and criers- especially those who walk around so disappointed in You. Some are sure You are not there- and they are mad at You for that."

"Well I'm tired of you thinking you have to defend me- that's the job of the stars and moon- and they do just fine- Thank-you."

I sit down in the sandstorm and feel the sting- the sandpaper grinds my flesh- a little layer at a time.
As I sit there, the greatest dragon I have ever encountered opens wide. His breath is nasty hot and his fangs are poised to strike.

At that point... I become the most surprised man on the planet.. I look with a steeliness and an anger and a vigor that I never felt before and I strike that dragon with a sword that had been hidden inside me- sharp and deadly.

I stand back up and the sand does not sting anymore. I finally get a little hint- faith is not the good life- it is the God-life.

The skeptics sneer at me still- 'false front' they say.

But my faith is on the line- and my love is on display. "No No" I say "Look at my gospel. It is not pretty and nice... it is authentic and true.- it is scratched, dented, beat up, and worn...but it sure looks good on me and feels so much like home....

I LAUGH

Because my lot is really easy and the burden is light..Faith means I have no knowledge of the next minute- there may be death/pain/loss/rejection/sickness/tragedy- but I persevere in the firm confidence that God's love NEVER leaves me.

I prayed about my cold heart- and God breaks it. He binds it back up- but it never stops leaking after that- and that leakage is streams of mercy.

So I laugh at my silly pity party- God smiles.

I look at my girls and thank Him- and discover that is the foundation of worship.

And then I see how good we are- what strong shape we are in- and find the greatest truth of all. It was NOTHING in me- it was ALL IN HIM.

And I laugh so hard I cry.

Bring on Christmas!

Biblical Passages for Those Who Parent or Work with Teens Pt 3

 My blog over the next few weeks will be devoted to my work with students. Next year will mark 20 years that I have been involved in Christian Education and I wanted to reflect a little on my ministry philosophy and set some goals for the future- see the original blog at www.jayopsis.blogspot.com

PASSAGE 3- The Fruit of Faith Produces Obedience 

Ephesians 2:8-10 For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— 9 not by works, so that no one can boast. 10 For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.

This last passage is one that will take some very special and careful explanation. We all love this verse- how can it be any clearer? Our justification is purely Christ alone! Nothing can be added to Christ as the atonement for our sin. He paid it all and we simply receive this immeasurable gift by trust. We can not work or earn God’s favor- we do not merit it by good deeds- we can not add to it.

But the Scriptures do present a part 2. We do not believe in faith plus works- but we do hold to a faith that works. The amazing forgiveness we receive and the indescribable love that accomplished this feat compels us to follow the one who gave so much. Over time- an understanding of the gospel and the presence of God’s Holy Spirit should produce a general trend of obedient and abundant living. It is a slow process, it is a frustrating up and down, forward and back, existence- but there is ample Scripture to show that Christ died so that we may live- not to our ourselves- but to Him.

POTENTIAL PROBLEMS IN APPLICATION OF A SANCTIFICATION STANDARD OF OBEDIENCE

Now, the biggest mistakes we make in this area is when we (1) try to sanctify others or (2) buy into a false belief that education equals reformation.Let’s take these two things separately. As soon as I begin to grow in obedience and receive the blessings of living within God’s design I want others to join me. Often, this is a good intention- and it can serve a dual purpose: I want to celebrate success and bring someone with me. But before long I see a subtle and sinister root take hold- I begin to expect things in others that I have done myself. I begin to compare my successes with failure in others and at some point I begin to demand in others MORE than I expect in myself. In a short amount of time- I have walked away from the gospel of grace and built a prison of legalism and instead of loving others, I am oppressing them. How quickly I have abandoned salvation by grace through faith.

The second mistake is to accept the notion that education is the key to reform. This is a tough one, because my entire professional life has centered round the value of education. There is a noble use of education and also a diabolical one. In its purest noble application, education is about teaching skills of observation, communication, thinking logically, reading, writing, and mathematical computations to allow for a greater degree of knowing God and evaluating all of life by His truth.The potential problem of education and its diabolical application is producing knowledge that creates pride and artificial division of people. A Christian is NEVER anti science/technology/or knowledge- but he must see this pursuit as what it is- a result of the Biblical mandate to subdue and rule the earth as a good steward and not a power grab. 

I guess the clearest example of this is what has transpired to human society in the wake of the enlightenment- once we elevate education over piety – it creates and unintended competition where we judge men according to academic credentials and not the content of character. And we begin to believe that advancements in knowledge will solve man’s biggest problems. The enlightenment, with all of it’s great achievements, unintentionally lifted up elites and gave them a voice based on knowledge, but not necessarily wisdom or morality. High intelligence has a hard time keeping an ego in check- and slowly trades questioning to cynicism or skepticism- and enthrones reason.As reason generates knowledge- it also creates power- and power in the hands of a man, especially one without a moral compass – can quickly generate oppression and greed.

Now, let me stop here and clarify what I am NOT saying. I am not saying that education is evil. I strongly lament the retreat that has happened in the evangelical world in regards to educational excellence and participation and I sadly admit to the intellectual laziness that places God in the gaps of knowledge and indulges in distraction and distaste for hard questions- we have no excuse here. What I am saying is that the church continues to evaluate progress on the city of man’s standards of intellectual arrogance and not the humility and gratitude of acknowledging that ALL TRUTH IS GOD’S TRUTH and placing everything under the authority of His Word.

Here is a subtle hint of how this is not ingrained in our current thinking. What do I spend the most time on and give the weightiest praise to? My daughter’s knowledge of the high priestly prayer in John 17 or her ACT score? What gets me more excited- her ability to speak in Spanish or her ability to quote Romans 1? Again- we should praise God if our children make a 29 on the ACT and get excited about foreign language… but wouldn’t it excite us if they loved the Bible so much that they read it….memorized it…used it… taught it…? And believe me, I am condemning myself as a parent as I write this.

Biblical Passages for Those Who Parent or Work with Teens Pt 2

My blog over the next few weeks will be devoted to my work with students. Next year will mark 20 years that I have been involved in Christian Education and I wanted to reflect a little on my ministry philosophy and set some goals for the future- see the original blog at www.jayopsis.blogspot.com


PASSAGE 2 - THE INEVITABLE ANTI-OUTCOME OR WHAT ARE WE RESISTING?

II TIMOTHY 3:1-9  "1 But mark this: There will be terrible times in the last days. 2 People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, 3 without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, 4 treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God— 5 having a form of godliness but denying its power. Have nothing to do with such people. 6 They are the kind who worm their way into homes and gain control over gullible women, who are loaded down with sins and are swayed by all kinds of evil desires, 7 always learning but never able to come to a knowledge of the truth. 8 Just as Jannes and Jambres opposed Moses, so also these teachers oppose the truth. They are men of depraved minds, who, as far as the faith is concerned, are rejected. 9 But they will not get very far because, as in the case of those men, their folly will be clear to everyone."

Passage 1 (yesterday) was more optimistic- be patient- God will get them where they need to be.

Passage 2 is more pessimistic- there is a downward spiral that doesn’t offer much promise to change.

Every time I read the above passage I get sad. I grieve over the slow decay of society and pray for renewal. Oh Lord please rend the heavens and delay this decay! 

Yet, it is important to be realistic- the city of man will have a consistent testimony throughout history- and the bottom line is not a pretty picture.

G.K. Beale has a very interesting quote regarding this: “Worldliness is what any culture does to make sin seem normal and righteousness seem strange.” 

The list above is where all of us are headed without an intervention. Don’t I see these base impulses in myself? At my core nature I am selfish-materialistic-arrogant and boastful- autonomous- slanderous, especially of the weak or downtrodden- an addict- an animal self and a diabolical self- pursuer of leisure and pleasure more than a pursuer of God- living in a Christ haunted land – holding to my rituals- but cold in my relationships. I am manipulative. The more I learn, the less I know. And the fruit is shameful.

The application of this verse is to combat the decay and the trend. What tools are at my disposal to see that this ‘default mode’ is resisted at every point?

Fortunately, the gospel takes aim right at the root of the issue. The renewal that comes in by embracing justification by grace through faith strikes a mighty blow to this cycle of cynicism and addiction. The employment of all the means of grace can stop and reverse these deadly trends and issues.  

For me personally, and for those who dwell in these communities of faith, it is incumbent to encourage and stir one another up in love and good deeds- to memorize, study, and meditate on God’s Word, to assemble for worship, to proclaim Christ, and participate in the sacraments to fight against the domain of darkness.

Have we not grown weary of the ineffective programs and snappy slogans? We must all agree with Dr Martyn Lloyd Jones “ I am never tired of saying that the church does not need to embark on some new methodology or program but must herself start living the Christian life.”

What can we do to inspire young leaders to fight against this 'default mode'? This is my largest goal and constant prayer!

Biblical Passages for Those Who Parent or Work with Teens

My blog over the next few weeks will be devoted to my work with students. Next year will mark 20 years that I have been involved in Christian Education and I wanted to reflect a little on my ministry philosophy and set some goals for the future- see the original blog at www.jayopsis.blogspot.com

PASSAGE 1- PATIENCE IN THE PREPARATION OF WINESKINS

Luke 5:33-39: 33 They said to him, “John’s disciples often fast and pray, and so do the disciples of the Pharisees, but yours go on eating and drinking.”
34 Jesus answered, “Can you make the friends of the bridegroom fast while he is with them? 35 But the time will come when the bridegroom will be taken from them; in those days they will fast.”
36 He told them this parable: “No one tears a piece out of a new garment to patch an old one. Otherwise, they will have torn the new garment, and the patch from the new will not match the old. 37 And no one pours new wine into old wineskins. Otherwise, the new wine will burst the skins; the wine will run out and the wineskins will be ruined. 38 No, new wine must be poured into new wineskins. 39 And no one after drinking old wine wants the new, for they say, ‘The old is better.’” 

This passage has always helped me in my work with students AND as a parent. I know that the applications may be less direct in my line of work, but some clear principles are here both for the teacher/parent and for the students. And even though the context here is the nature of the New Covenant Kingdom- the applications are valid.

Context and Overview: Jesus is being carefully watched and critiqued. It is interesting how the flow fits here, and you almost paint a narrative though I admit it brings in some speculation. Jesus is getting active and drawing interest and the implications of His ministry is causing uneasiness. The status quo is being challenged and it always attacks rivals. The key word is found right above this passage, in verse 29 “But the Pharisees and the teachers of the law who belonged to their sect ‘complained’. What is the difference in a complaint and a question? What is the dividing line of helpful critique and a damaging complaint? We know the answer- matters of intentionality.
Their first critique is that they are eating and drinking with sinners. Jesus answers the sinner issue. The second criticism is that they are eating and drinking. In their understanding, religious zeal is regulated and evaluated by ascetic lifestyle. I find it interesting that Jesus uses a wine analogy to answer the charge.
Of course the biblical principle centers around the timeliness of behavior and allowance of the pleasurable when appropriate. Basically Jesus is saying- sometimes the time is right and sometimes the time is not right. Ultimately we enjoy pleasure at the allowance of our King who also is our Father. We serve at his will and not ours. There are times for feasting and there are times of fasting- it’s not important what we do, it is important why and for who we do it.
This seems to be an important point of the New Testament and the emphasis on conscience and concern for the weaker brother- or in other words- not using freedom as an offense (another day and another topic).
Jesus implies that He is involved in a process and the first step is preparation. You prepare a new wineskin, then fill it with new wine, as it ferments both the wineskin and wine are changed. The structure influences the substance and the substance changes the structure. The process takes time and involves pressure and constriction and contraction.
At some point, the wineskin is opened and the aged, desirous, aromatic and beneficent drink is used.
To put new wine into an old/used wineskin is foolish. The old skin cannot withstand the new process – it can only take so much for so long. And it is senseless to patch an old with a new piece- you ruin both. You must make allowances for time and pressure to produce the good stuff.
The overall point is that Jesus is bringing in a new administration of the covenant of grace and these disciples are going to carry this new wine into a new structure. They will face pressure and suffering- they will fast in time-AND the product will be beautiful.

APPLICATION TO THOSE WHO PARENT/WORK WITH TEENS:
PATIENCE- wineskins are in process. As sophisticated as a senior seems, they are still just a new wineskin that will be filled and capped in time. My guess is that they will pour out the gospel in whole new structures and I have no clue what it will look like. I will not be able to work in that new structure- I just need to pour out my wine in faithfulness to my Father.
PROPRIETY: In a weird twist- we should teach the teens to serve at the Lord’s will, not their hasty whim. The bridegroom is away for now- so we need to fast and practice self discipline- enjoying pleasure- YES- but in His timing and in His way.
So we have a strange application- the trials of life are coming- be patient. I do not expect my senior daughter to have the sanctification of a 30 year old. God will fill her and ferment her in circumstances and time to produce a beneficial fruit. She will be changed and the world will be impacted- at His pleasure and for His glory.
At the same time- trust God in this timing by obeying Him. There is a reason He wants abstinence and soberness- pleasure is not sinful- using pleasure outside his allowances is sinful. As a parent/teacher I am to be patient with their spiritual immaturity and they are to be patient with God’s restrictions. Both are points of perseverance.

Movie Review: 'Collision' with Christopher Hitchens and Doug Wilson

I don't know why it took me so long to see the movie 'Collision'- but I downloaded it from Amazon.com and finished it today. It is a beautiful and fun movie. The stuff being put out today in the area of Apologetics is great because the film makers understand how to use fast moving editing and music to make dry debates interesting.
    These types of interactions are good. I see Hitchen's in such a better light and I confess my admiration for him and have found myself praying for him, crying out to God for him, especially in light of his recent fight with terminal cancer.
I also have to say how impressed I am with Doug Wilson, his patient and calm defense of Christianity through pre-suppositional apologetics, his reformed theology, and his great training puts him as a man called for such a time as this.
As I continue to see the whole debate coming to cosmology, teleology, and morality- I keep wondering why the apologist never presses the skeptic being created in God's image. Why can Hitchen's know good and do good even though he does not believe? Because he cannot escape the fact that he is an image bearer. He is a beautiful creation, regardless of his rebellious state. I'm sure there is a tactical reason that the apologist does not go there- but I would bite.

I love the bottom line for Wilson: 'The Christian faith is good for the world because it provides the fixed standard which atheism cannot provide and because it provides forgiveness for sins, which atheism cannot provide either. We need the direction of the standard because we are confused sinners. We need the forgiveness because we are guilty sinners. Atheism not only keeps the guilt, but it also keeps the confusion.'

May we continue to step into the marketplace of ideas... no need to hide. The greatest opportunities in these debates is not a love of ideas, it is not to win arguments, it is the ability to love people- and that is where we make the biggest impression.

My Good-Natured Young Earth Views are Evolving

"Science gives us the full accord of facts- It costs the church a severe struggle to give up one interpretation and adopt another- but no evil need to be apprehended- The Bible still stands in the presence of the whole scientific community, unshaken”

Charles Hodge- Princeton 1829

I vividly remember my first encounter with evolution in the classroom. I was in 6th grade at Robinson Elementary and the mere mention of an unguided process that over eons of time turned a germ into a monkey and then into a man was laughable.


I don't know if the two visceral reactions were connected- but my 'red flag' aversion to evolution was equally comparable to my anger toward racism. At the core of my being, these views collapsed right in front of my deep grained instinct that the Creator was there and He was just and good.

This class was prone to tough debates and I remember the interesting realization that I was in the minority. It's funny, but my weakest argument to these elementary debaters was my firm stance on the 6 day creation account. But my God was big enough for the miracle... He could have done it in 6 seconds!

"Everyone knows that the universe is millions of years old"
"Oh Yeah?" I said.
"Yeah"


Do you believe me? I so remember it and I specifically remember being a science skeptic from my early years. I trusted God and I did not trust men. If God's story and man's story were in conflict...I'm taking God.

As I got older, and actually became a Christ follower, my argument grew more 'sophisticated'-

'A very smart man still has little perspective on time. He may know 75 years....possibly a select few know 100....but no one truly can perceive 1,000- let alone 1 million"

I will tell you that a young earth believer in Genesis has a pretty simple apologetic. God said it and that settles it. He was there and you weren't. I believe in 1 miracle GOD. You have to believe in millions of miracles without Him.

My next interesting skirmish was in Birmingham. I was teaching at a Christian school and we hosted Hugh Ross for a weekend. It seemed to be fine until Hugh got an audience with our Bible department. I remember sitting in the school library. My recollection was the audience was very small- three or four Bible teachers, our pastor, and a history teacher.


Hugh Ross had barely started before the odium thelogicum attacked with their guns blazing.
"How dare you teach this day age stuff?" "You are out of your field and have no right to make theological applications." "You have undone Romans, you have destroyed the gospel, in your view there is death before sin and death cannot happen before sin."
I was shocked and I was embarrassed. Though I still held to my literal, young earth view- I saw Hugh Ross as a man who proclaimed Jesus and taught a high view of Scripture.
I also need to say that I have deep respect for the Bible teachers- they loved Jesus and the gospel and knew the Bible so deeply. But this was a hot button topic.
It even got to the point that some in our Bible department would not label a college 'christian' unless it taught a young earth and a literal 6 day creation.

My questioning would get me small splashes of indignation. It is the mischievous side of me that kind of sadistically enjoys the turmoil.
 "Who says there can't be death before sin?"
"What if it meant spiritual death... or human death?"
"Did Adam not step on an ant?"
"Did the serpent eat bananas?" I know...stupid!

But they were settled- the slippery slope to liberalism begins when a person compromises Genesis 1. Once you begin... where does it stop? If the day is not literal- how can we say Adam and the garden are not figurative?


For a long time after that, I was the 'good-natured young earth  guy'. I held firm to my position, but did not question the faith of any 'old-earther' I ran into. There were times where I didn't know what was more shocking to them- the fact that I was young earth or the fact that I was accepting of others who weren't.

I moved to Nashville and began teaching apologetics. My department leader was old-earth and he seemed ok with my young earth view. The only time I got him riled up at all was my 'young earth that appears old' argument. He said it makes God deceitful. I never really agreed with that rebuttal because general revelation only declares that God is there- it takes special revelation to give out the details that He wants us to have. It would not bother me at all if I found an antique storage chest in my father's workshop.
"Wow, dad, this is amazing."
"How did you make this? It looks 200 years old!"
"I finished it this morning, son."
So a 5 minute tree in Eden had 35 rings... and it keeps a Biblical theme.. things are not always what they seem.

My apologetics study led me at first into evidentialists and the weapons against macro-evolution. You have to understand, that getting arguments against Darwin were thrilling to me. I hated what Darwin had done to the church. I remember that sheer anger I felt when I watched 'Inherit the Wind' and saw the biased attack on my faith. So how could I not cheer when I read about irreducible complexity, and the Cambrian explosion, and the faulty Miller Urey experiment.. and on and on.

But a funny thing happened- as I read the evidence I had to admit that there was no doubt that evolution was true. The slight, successful changes in species was studied and proven.
But the extrapolation of that theory into a naturalistic world-view which helped kick God out of classrooms and relegated faith to a 'stay at home' private thing was offensive. It didn't help that all of the neo-darwinists would take all kinds of explanations for life.... including aliens.. as long as God wasn't mentioned.

My young earth views were greatly helped by Douglas Kelly's excellent book "Creation and Change". But I also was helped by reading Einstein's biography and going back into Hugh Ross from time to time. I saw the two camps (young and old) as being tools to spread the gospel. Young earthers reach traditionalists and old earthers reach post-moderns. God had people in every sphere with a high view of Scripture and a love for gospel proclamation.

I even developed a 'power point' where I helped to clarify a lot of mistakes we make. It demonstrated how the Big Bang theory actually helps a theistic world view and how ID could be a rival to macro-evolution in the science classroom.

My next funny moment was when I was asked to speak at a Creation Conference at a Christian school across town that was also a big sports rival. I knew that my power-point was going to be picked to death by the 'Answers in Genesis' people. My mentioning of Intelligent Design was anathema and they took me to task in the gymnasium. The students loved it! The CPA football coach was getting grilled! After I answered their main criticism a few other panel speakers came up to me. 'I thought you made a great point". I thought 'thanks for speaking up for me'. But in a weird way, I enjoyed it.


Fast forward three years later and the growing evidence for an old universe and the slow erosion of young earth arguments have me reconsidering the whole thing. The only way I can stay young earth is to keep my "looks old, but is young" view. But most of the other supporting elements are easily explained away.

So I will spend some time going back to Genesis and considering again: Day Age- Analogical Days- Fiat Days- and Framework Views. I will pray and read and wrestle. I am not a scientist or a theologian... so I doubt I will ever be the last word on anything. But I enjoy the process and am so confident in my Heavenly Father that He and I will enjoy the process.

I started the background of this study by reading the Holman book: "Understanding Creation" edited by Jeremy Howard and designed by Doug Powell- two great local resources.

I am starting off with some honest questions:
How does Moses' background/education play into the way God spoke to him?
God dictated to Moses information- how does giving the info relate to the real time-line of the events?
Was there a purpose in God using current cultural structures as the best way to prepare the world for His solution for sin?
In what ways did God place himself in competition with false gods and rivals only to show His power and victory? Did He have to set up a parallel structure so we could see the difference?
If we adopt accomodist views of Scripture- where does the figurative stop and literal begin?
At what point do we end up in old-fashioned liberalism?
Is it possible for any man to think clearly here? Aren't we all influenced by presumptions? What if all the thoughts about the age of the universe are faulty models that don't take into account the possibility of fluctuations in time/space/history?
Is all of this battle over the beginning that important? Isn't the real skirmish over the life/death/words/ and resurrection of Jesus of Nazareth?

Should be a fun run!

Comments on "The Last Christian on Earth" by Os Guinness

I'm going to paraphrase and comment on some of Os Guiness's book that was originally published under the title, "The Gravedigger Files (IVP, 1983). This is a little like C.S. Lewis' Screwtape Letters, but more direct and informational.

The problem with this blog is to differentiate Guiness's points of brilliance and my random rambling. So anything in BLUE (italics in facebook notes) and  is me- and if Guinness contradicts my BLUE... choose Guinness!

Memorandum 2 is a phenomenon labeled 'The Sandman Effect' and is presented as an enemy tactic versus the church.

In this tactic, the church digs its own grave while Christians sleep.

The major premise of the Sandman Effect is to infiltrate the church by use of culture- which exposes the defensive vulnerability of the church. Instead of the church becoming more aware of the damaging effects of popular culture, she falls into a deeper and deeper sleep.

The first experiment with this tactic is confusing the nature of belief. The impact of the enlightenment produced unexpected and unintended results.  The pomp and pressure of those who presented themselves as the intellectual elite offered much promise, but only produced exclusive caste systems and cynicism. The ultimate fruit of intellectual oppression is a quest for power and the greatest use of that power is cynical, dream killing, skepticism.

I love how Guinness describes this: "Yes, there was brilliance, but its darker side was the empty rhetoric, the hypocritical poses, the shabby compromises. the betrayal of friends and causes, with some people fellow-traveling with the communists, and others more or less sleeping with fanaticism...The legacy of this kind of general mood became a more effective inoculation against faith that a hundred (Voltaires)". The desire for truth went out of fashion..... which led the way for post-modernism which is not a clear philosophy... it is also a mood.

And here is where we (Christians, especially in the south) go wrong- we fail to see what has happened among those who are not the traditionalists. Traditionalists have a strong sense of right and wrong- they have a foundation of TRUTH.

But we are increasingly living among those (especially the young- media savvy- who tend to think by sight and act by impulse) who judge truth not by objectivity, but degrees of plausibility.

In Guinness's words- "we have created a climate in which a thing's seeming to be true is often mistaken for its being true."

And what is the means of this change? By changing the definition and standards of 'belief'.

We allow and even applaud people who believe or disbelieve on non-rational or psychological grounds. YOUR FEELINGS ARE VALID AND YOUR ACTIONS ARE JUSTIFIED BECAUSE THEY ARE PLAUSIBLE, EVEN IF THEY DO NOT CONNECT TO REALITY OR TRUTH.

I love Guinness's analogy here: we accept a person who is an atheist- not because they have weighed truth and fallacy- but simply because their father was a religious hypocrite who alienated the family from God as much as himself.

Unfortunately, we fall into this trap when we begin to elevate psychology over Scripture or only accept interpretation and application of Scripture as it fits the latest psychological models.

See how subtle it is? We agree with truth if the support structure is strong. But if the support structure is weak, it is harder to believe.

"Coach it with care and and plausibility will upstage credibility"- this is a scary statement.

The church has become a heart suffering from fibrillation - the rapid, irregular, and unsynchronized contraction of muscle fibers- 

one spasmodic side is the Christian philosophers- who expound the theoretical- and the other meaningless motion is the 'just give me Jesus' anti-intellectual crowd who throw out doctrine.

Then Guinness shows how the Apostle Paul provides a framework for the fight. He knows that the church is the pillar and bulwark of truth... not theory. "Paul would have believed his faith was objectively true if he had been the last one convinced of it."
The truth of Christianity is NOT dependent on a strong church.. but a weak church hides TRUTH as it seems less credible, and a less credible church is a less plausible church.

A Two-Legged Stool: Guinness also shows how apologists only use 2 of three tools of analysis in unveiling this issue.
Leg 1- The history of ideas
Leg 2- The climate of culture and custom
and the missing...Leg 3- the justification of knowledge

In the post modern world- cultural pluralism and relativism offers confusion in leg 2 and the rapid flow and dynamics of information makes Leg 1 seemingly archaic and irrelevant (and BORING). But if we pressed more into Leg 3 and make the post-modern man justify his knowledge beyond the perspective of personal experience and evaluate truth claims in a more logical framework- we would see some progress and usefulness of the other 2 legs.

A huge roadblock in this mess is the frenzied pace of communication technology and global mobility. I love the quote about the Kenyan saying "All westerners have watches...  but Africans have time."

"A culture of mobility plus convenience leads quite naturally not only to (drive-in food) and banks but also drive-in churches"

See how it works? Overlay upon overlay- the effect of molding lives through culture has all the advantages of a revolution and none of the disadvantages of intellectual sweat.

As our children see belief as a feeling of plausibility and relevance- as they are spun dizzy by infinite activity- as they are enticed by the promise of convenience- as they are distracted by new cool tools of transport of information tsunamis- they cannot understand that TRUTH is TRUE even if no one ascribes to it. 'When the Son of Man returns, will he find faith on the earth?' He won't, if we have lost what 'faith' means. What will He say when we respond "It just didn't 'seem' right... It didn't feel true"?

'Subtle compromise is always better than sudden captivity'.

Father- we need help. We need to slow down- we need to read the WORD- chew it- meditate on it and mull it over- we need true WORSHIP to lift us out of the trivial pursuits and insulated hearts.

In short- we have loved things and ideas that have not loved us back. We live for pleasure while the King suffered and died. 

Culture makes godliness seem strange, but without truth... justification of life is meaningless- 

Our children need to see us forsaking our idols- because the idols will soon forsake them.

But we also need to train our children how to ask the right questions- make men justify their beliefs.... make them follow the consequences of their faith.....and Holy Spirit...PLEASE illumine the TRUTH.

Pure Freedom and Fun- the 2010 CPA Football Team

Galatians 2:20 I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.

It has been a long time since my last post and way too many ideas to share at this time.

I will be drafting some ideas after football season about all that I have been learning...reading..etc. I especially want to write about the Transcendental Argument for God at some point and press into some ideas from our recent apologetics conference.

But this post is about football and the sad end to our season against Goodpasture in the TSSAA football state playoffs.

I am so proud of my football team- if you have a facebook account, I encourage you to find "QB Club" on facebook and take in the pictures and videos of this special group of winners.

This team took the foundation of last year's team and pushed it further. This team worked hard and lead well. And we are had more fun than a person should be allowed.

If you showed up in our locker room or attended our practices, it would would strike you as strange. This was s a 'loosy goosey' bunch- but NOT to their detriment.

This team is clearly bore the fruit of what we hope to produce in this program: these young men have  a warrior spirit and a loving heart. They fight hard and know how to show love as brothers.

An example of this was last week against Pearl-Cohn, one of the most physical football teams we have ever hosted on our field. We attacked those guys with absolutely no flinching! I'm telling you that this was a senior stacked team going against our guys (12 freshmen and sophomores starting) and we matched them blow for blow.

In the end, we fell short 17-14. The PC head coach called me over the weekend and we marveled at how hard hitting the game was.

But let me tell you the 2nd big thing- our guys were and are undaunted. We have had some heart-breaking losses this season and some thrilling wins- ending up 5-6. Don't get me wrong- we have hurt when we have lost- but not like it is the end of the world. This team cannot be defeated- knock them down- and they keep coming.

Why? Because they have understood what this is all about- and it has NOTHING to do with football. This team has embraced what we are really about and that is glorifying God by enjoying football and embracing the challenge of getting better and playing hard.
Does that mean we are sinless? Heaven's NO! Were we bad at times? YES
I have had to correct our guys about language, attitude, silliness, coarseness, and this head coach has manifest sin inside and out.
But they are not afraid to bow to the King and acknowledge our only hope- the gospel of Jesus Christ.
This team sang "A Mighty Fortress is our God" by their choice and they hit the door with a mission- LEAVE IT ALL ON THE FIELD.
It wasn't in God's plan for us to move ahead- don't expect us to live like life is over. Our battle has only begun- and we will smile in adversity and celebrate success.

You ought to look at the last few pictures in the album below- see guys who fight hard and love well. I especially encourage you to look at the last pictures of the seniors- they cried hard- and then they pulled it together- and the last sounds in the locker room as joy and celebration. How many high school seniors get to do that?
http://pakempdds.smugmug.com/CPA-Football-2010/Varsity/Playoff-Game-CPA-vs/14530887_Ljhti
 

Personally, I will take a break from it- and then I want to keep getting better. We have young linemen who need to have a great offseason and we were a young team. Spring football begins in 6 months.

update:  Pearl-Cohn sends 10 football players to college ranks
Source: blogs.tennessean.com