What Are We Afraid of This Halloween?

I have fighting some sadness lately. In conversations with some high school students and my own children, it has been very apparent that many of our young people today are burdened by an ever growing darkness and what they see as a fragile future.

Sometimes it is deep and they don't really understand what is burdening them… but as I talk to them, it comes out... fear of the future, frustration with life, no real understanding of friendships, and anemic faith..... 

And it dawned on me how different life seems as a young adult in 2015 from what it seemed to me as a young man. .

My early adult experiences was Ronald Reagan and a resurgent America. How far away does that seem!? It was a grand time… but it was borne in hard times… the Carter years that seemed to slouch toward defeat, stemming from Vietnam and the Watergate scandal. President Carter’s America was one that felt like weakness.. Iranian hostages, gasoline shortages, and staggering interest rates.

Reagan came in at a great time, including a new type of media- Rush Limbaugh and talk radio full of conservative ideas. Heck, it turned my mom and dad into Republicans so fast, even I was amazed! But we all know the truth... the truth of what we need in not found in politics.

But this post is not about political parties or Presidents… those things ARE important. And though I am worried about this nation, it is worth fighting for and there is always hope for renewal.

This post is about the deeper story- the one we are in and the one where the stakes are SO MUCH HIGHER.. because eternity hangs in the balance.

It’s time I remind all of us of a harsh truth- and our reaction to this truth will make all of the difference in our life… everyday for the rest of our earthly existence….

And here it is…. we live under a curse.

Yes, even God’s covenant children….

The world is cursed, I am cursed…..

OUR NATION IS SUFFERING....

Our post-modern, secular, greed stained carnage has left us :

 fractured from no consensus- 

shallow from endless sound bites and sloganeering (please- no more snappy mission statements)- 

disillusioned from no appeal to truth, and 

fatigued from microwave, fast paced activities, but no form to support the pressure.

But all of this is found in Genesis Chapter 3........

Warning- this stuff is likely to make you mad!

THE CURSE ON WOMEN

To the woman he said,

“I will surely multiply your pain in childbearing;
in pain you shall bring forth children.
Your desire shall be for your husband,
and he shall rule over you.”

(Genesis 3:16 ESV)

Your reaction to this is crucial…..

Some in this day laugh this message  as ‘Hebrew myth’ no different than Greek mythology.

They mock it… rebel against it… some even hate God because of it.

Can I speak of Genesis without sounding like a loon OR a heretic?

I accept it as it stands. I have no reason to not believe that Adam and Eve were real. The condition of the world and the condition of man logically fits here- the amazing beauty and power of man and the corruption of man…. the creation of God and the brokenness of sin.

At the same time..this is a story- from a Father to His children- too young and stubborn to understand- so it is also a type of accommodating communication- so we can understand just enough of a deeper truth. We are in a cursed world, we live under a curse, and we are in an ‘eternal stakes war’ for our very lives! But we also know the Victor!

____________________________

So, if I may… let’s look at the curse to women in reverse order.

DESIRE

Your desire shall be for your husband,
and he shall rule over you.”

Yikes! This one has undone culture and relationships for all of human history.

Eve took a hard hit!

God made woman to be servant to the man… because of the sin of disobedience.

It wasn’t like that in the original creation mandate...Eve was made 2nd...from Adam’s rib. But she was (and women still are) a better creation. Human 2.0 was double dust refined. And she was not intended to be subject to men…AND in the restored new world… it will be as it should- male and female equal under the loving rule of God. Adam did not rule over Eve before the fall- but he did after- and it was NOT GOOD- it was a curse.

And women suffer that curse to this day. Bad husbands and bad bosses- a world where women are treated so poorly by overbearing men.

It shouldn’t be this way- and the gospel reverses much of the curse, but it doesn’t fully undo the effects.

Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.

Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.

(Ephesians 5:22-28 ESV)

A NOTE TO ALL YOUNG GIRLS..choose wisely- it would be better to stay single than to marry a man who is unwilling to be ruled by God’s Word- because even the best men fail in this command.

Is it fair that this is a man’s world? (and always will be)? No it is not.. it is a curse and we suffer from it all the time. And even if Hillary Clinton is elected president or a future woman becomes a queen- she will never be a King.

But - if you fight this message- mock it, bow up against it- you are not ‘heart ready’ to receive the TRUE AND JUST KING- your Heavenly Father-.... Be patient.... and watch Him make all of this right!

Let me mention one more thing- that nasty part of the curse “Your desire shall be….”

Oh that one hurts!… crushes our hearts every stinking day! It makes me sad to see young women hurting!

A woman’s heart longs and is never filled. Life is a constant let down….. mean girls, cat fights, pay injustice, sexual abuse, absent husbands, broken promises, racism, cruel words… women have suffered FAR MORE than men.

And our ONLY hope is to keep tuning our hearts to Jesus… it is so hard because you can’t hold Him, you can’t see Him- but NEVER lose your faith to hold and see HIm- He alone can fill that longing!

____________________________________

PAIN

I will surely multiply your pain in childbearing;
in pain you shall bring forth children.

Yes, there is physical pain.... but this is more than just contractions in labor!

This is a “multiplied pain”

No one cries like moms do!

Because it is one kind of pain for you to hurt… but mommas… they hurt so much worse when their children suffer.

In a mom- the curse is multiplied by exponents!

Their desires…..unfilled

Their husbands…. cannot quench their desires and OFTEN make it worse (think about all the betrayal, divorce, and abandonment in our society! Think about the impossible life of single moms!)

They see their children suffer! There is nothing like hearing a broken mom’s heart in my job- those tears haunt me almost every day!

And (I don’t know why) children will even at times harm the mom- and sometimes the children harm each other!

Hand in there.... good news is coming!

THE CURSE ON MEN

And to Adam he said, “Because you have listened to the voice of your wife and have eaten of the tree of which I commanded you, ‘You shall not eat of it,’ cursed is the ground because of you; in pain you shall eat of it all the days of your life; thorns and thistles it shall bring forth for you; and you shall eat the plants of the field. By the sweat of your face you shall eat bread, till you return to the ground, for out of it you were taken; for you are dust, and to dust you shall return.” (Genesis 3:17-19 ESV)

Think about the curse for a moment- blood, sweat, pain, thorns...death

And consider what Jesus suffered for us- He took on all the curse- so that one day it may be lifted!

SO WHAT?

Let me share two Bible verses and finish……

For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us. For the creation waits with eager longing for the revealing of the sons of God. For the creation was subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of him who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be set free from its bondage to corruption and obtain the freedom of the glory of the children of God. For we know that the whole creation has been groaning together in the pains of childbirth until now. And not only the creation, but we ourselves, who have the first fruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies. For in this hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.

Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.

(Romans 8:18-26 ESV)

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! According to his great mercy, he has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, to an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading, kept in heaven for you, who by God's power are being guarded through faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time. In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, so that the tested genuineness of your faith—more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire—may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ. Though you have not seen him, you love him. Though you do not now see him, you believe in him and rejoice with joy that is inexpressible and filled with glory, obtaining the outcome of your faith, the salvation of your souls.

(1 Peter 1:3-9 ESV)

TO ANY YOUNG PERSON LIVING IN FEAR....... GIVE YOUR HEART TO JESUS CHRIST- THE NAME ABOVE ALL NAMES.

I don't know what the future holds... but HE holds the future!

Read these verses over and over again- preach the gospel to yourself everyday.

In spite of our sin and the curse- WE HAVE REASON TO HOPE

AND NEVER, NEVER, NEVER, EVER…. AND I MEAN NEVER LOSE HOPE.

In fact never lose “Faith, Hope, and Love”

Can America be great again? Yes, it is good to pray and work for that...but if it doesn’t, I still have hope! I will NEVER lose hope because my destiny is secure!

Is life hard? even cruel? YES! But that is OK, it cannot rob me of HOPE!

Do we fall down, sin, blow it? YES! But that will NEVER cause me to lose hope and nothing you can ever do will LIMIT GOD’S LOVE FOR YOU as YOUR FATHER! WOW!

Fight the curse everyday!

The curse makes your heart hurt - it makes you feel lonely- depressed,fearful, etc- but cling to the cross no matter what you think the circumstances are!

An Illustration: THE WALKING DEAD

We live in a real ‘walking dead’ world- black and gray- no sun- everything is the dead of winter- and smells like rotting death.

And you were like that- a zombie- doomed to roam and thirst- but never filled.

And then one day, your heart became alive- it began to beat life, color, and light!

And now you are a child of light- everything you touch becomes alive and green as long as your heart beats the light of Jesus.

But if you let sin and doubt creep in… it darkens your heart- before long…. cynicism, fear, insecurity, jealousy, anger, bitterness, pride- shuts out God’s light- now everything you touch stays dead….

But if you keep in touch with the God of light, He cleanses your heart- and you begin spreading life again. The coolest part of that is that you can even bring walkers back to life as you breathe God’s message on them.

No matter how dark things may be- I will never lose the joys of bringing light to dead places. In the world and in my own life!

One day, the King will return- and the sun will shine in glory- all the injustice and sadness will be cast away!

I will see Jesus and I will explode in glorious power and a perfect body- I will see my mom…. cancer free! I will see friends I have lost.

And… because of POWERFUL God-given grace…. I will see you if you trust in the work of Christ to atone for your sin.

This is NO FAIRY-TALE DREAM!

May you be strengthened with all power, according to his glorious might, for all endurance and patience with joy, giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in light. He has delivered us from the domain of darkness and transferred us to the kingdom of his beloved Son, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.

(Colossians 1:11-14 ESV)

UNTIL THEN...and let’s stay patient to allow Him to bless us as we share the light…

Live and love in faith and hope…. that the world will stand amazed… watch His methods… watch His ways!

How Steve Spurrier's Sudden Resignation Shook Me Up

Nature’s first green is gold, 
Her hardest hue to hold. 
Her early leaf’s a flower; 
But only so an hour. 
Then leaf subsides to leaf. 
So Eden sank to grief, 
So dawn goes down to day. 
Nothing gold can stay. 

Robert Frost

It was strange seeing the headline run across the bottom of my TV last night. At the age of 70, and currently 2-4 (0-4 in the SEC), Steve Spurrier knew his time was over. Despite all the criticism about him walking out mid-season..... it is already next year as far as recruiting is concerned, and Steve did not pull any punches in his press conference.

"My answer has always been the same ... If it starts going south, starts going bad, then I need to get out. ... It's time for me to get out of the way and give somebody else a go at it."

So I sat there looking at him..... amazing health and vitality for 70!

And it dawned on me....... "In 19 years, I will be right there!"

And it has shaken me....... Steve Spurrier won the Heisman trophy, is a Hall of Fame coach, wealthy, famous, beloved, won a national title.... but do you know what is his most valuable commodity?

TIME

He has done well with his time.... but it just keeps tricking and moving......

Have you ever read the A.E. Housman poem, "Loveliest of Trees"?

It takes a Bible verse, Psalm 90:10 and presents a powerful truth.

Psalm 90:10King James Version (KJV)10 The days of our years are threescore years and ten; and if by reason of strength they be fourscore years, yet is their strength labour and sorrow; for it is soon cut off, and we fly away.

In other words, our lives are generally 70 years (3 score is 60)- 80 if we are strong.

Now the poem:

Loveliest of trees the cherry now         
Is hung with bloom along the bough
And stands about the woodland ride
Wearing white for Eastertide.

Now of my three score years and ten,
twenty will not come again.
And take from seventy years a score, 
It only leaves me fifty more.

And since to look at things in bloom,
Fifty Springs is little room, 
About the woodlands I will go
To see the cherry hung with snow.

See what the poet is saying? It is the Spring and he is looking at the Cherry Blossoms. He is 20 years old and he realizes that if his days are 70 years.... he now only has 50 more times to see this majestic sight! So he is not going to waste it!

I am only 19 years away from Steve Spurrier and the end of his golden era..... nothing lasts except the Word of God and the souls of men....

What do I need to be doing right now?

Oh I wish time could freeze- but it won't.

My babies are grown....

I sometimes feel my age.....

Lord, please don't let me waste it!

May I one day say with Paul- and though it could come at any time...( I hope it is at least 3 scores and 10!)

For I am already being poured out as a drink offering, and the time of my departure has come. I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. Henceforth there is laid up for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous judge, will award to me on that Day, and not only to me but also to all who have loved his appearing.

(2 Timothy 4:6-8 ESV)

How Rebuilding a Boat Helped Rebuild Me

Note: When I started writing this blog site in 2004, it was a commitment from me to live out my life in as transparent a way as possible. The following post is an example. it is very personal, but one that is a testimony to God's presence, His grace, His mercy, His blessing- I am nothing and He is everything.

Because it is so personal, I would like to request that you not share or post this to social media .. I can't stop it, if you do.... if you stumble on this and read it, I welcome a comment on this page, but again...at least for a few months, let it stay here.

I have no idea the shelf life of a google blog..... it's gone on a lot longer than I ever imagined... but one day maybe one of my children or grandchildren will be able to read these posts and see how faithful the God of the Bible is.....

So here is as honest as I can express my last few years.......

I don't have to rehash all the circumstances that led to coming back to Birmingham, AL in 2011.

As a coach, I discovered that a fear I had had for much of my life wasn't nearly the monster it purported to be. I won't be the first or the last football coach to be dismissed. I experienced this after going 3-7 and 5-6 in 2009 and 2010.

To say it is very humbling doesn't quite describe the depths of the hurt.

Just about all of my life I was used to winning. I think I enjoyed going 45-3-1 as a player from 7th- 12th grades including a 17-4-1 record as a starting varsity QB at Banks High School (1980 and 81 season).

I played for championship coaches David Cutcliffe and Paul 'Bear' Bryant.

As an assistant coach, I was fortunate to win 3 state titles and enjoyed a streak of 112- 4 from 1996-2003.

In Nashville, I enjoyed a dream and experienced a nightmare.

The Nashville City Paper summarized an amazing, but turbulent 7 years:

I will tell you that being let go sent me into a turmoil of faith and a flattened ego. The day I had to tell my wife and children I had lost my job was as difficult a day I have ever had in my life.

When you are on a winning streak, you don't feel like you can ever lose. Once you lose that mojo, you wonder if you can ever win.

The hardest part of leaving Nashville was that I knew we were about to be really good. A wonderful man and coach took over after I left and he has gone 54-4 and won a state title since my departure. I guess the folks who wanted me gone feel vindicated, and no doubt he drew some talent in that I may not have... So I applaud him, but I also do feel like we left a good foundation in place for him and I have celebrated their success...... way to go!

To show you how gracious the Lord is.... He showed up in a tangible way for me every single day for  almost 4 months after I was fired. He ministered to me in His Word. He made the path smooth in leading me to His next calling on my life and He made it clear that I was sent to Nashville because He needed to work on me.

I realize that a lot of my sports motivation was an addiction to sports glory. A lot of my significance came from people applauding me as a great player or coach. And like all competitors, I feared and hated losing more than I loved winning. In summary, all of that was an idol.

I spent long hours talking to the Lord, most of them training for the Music City Marathon which I completed in 2011. The 26.2 mile run was a sign that I still could compete- I still had a fire to finish.

I came back to Briarwood in 2011 as a pretty fragile guy. I was ready to be rebuilt, but my spiritual and emotional health wasn't going to come quickly. It is a long road back.

And of all things, God intended for me to work as a school disciplinarian (Dean of Students).... talk about a job to break you of other people's applause!

Coaching was good coming back. My first year, I got to enjoy just coaching receivers and it was like drinking from a fresh well... head coaches don't really get to coach like that! It was so freeing to just teach routes, blocking, and taking time to encourage kids.

In year two, I was able to experience head coaching again as I took over the freshman team. It was so enjoyable...simple and innocent!

I received a special blessing at the end of that season where circumstances led to me taking over as offensive coordinator of the varsity ream for the 1st 2 rounds of the playoffs. We pulled off two major upsets and I was back on track to believing I was a good coach after all.

I spent the full season in 2013 as offensive coordinator and personally feel like it was one of the best coaching jobs I have ever done. And I had the pleasure of doing it with amazing coaches and players.
I have a E-book coming out this Spring from Coaches Edge Technology that will describe the offense we used that season. I have had coaches from all over the country contact me about the fast break huddle and some of the concepts we used that year. Coaches Edge signed me to a contract to teach some of the concepts and plays.

Because it is so recent, I can't go into all the details of what happened in 2014...but this past year, the Lord allowed similar circumstances to happen that haunted me like the nightmare of my final two years in Nashville. I heard the same voices, saw the same attitudes, and experienced the same pain that had crushed me just a few years earlier.

And I regressed...... and the Lord seemed distant this time. I ran another marathon in 2015, but this time- the Lord withdrew- I felt I was fighting the race alone. He wasn't mad at me, He loves me enough to let pain mold me.

I experienced more personal attacks.... the lowest moment was when a parent roasted me over a lie his son had told him. I tried to convince this dad that I wasn't guilty of what he was accusing me of.... but this man was convinced... I was a bad man........

It didn't take much evaluation that I was needing to get away from coaching for awhile. My school job had turned into a 24/7 full time on call affair. I just can't do both effectively until we apply some needed changes and I need to continue changing as well.

I have to mention that in the midst of this transition, my heart has been broken in the loss of two brothers... one, my spiritual brother, Terry and the other my youngest blood brother, Lee. One died of suicide and the other of a drug overdose. One fought a 20 year battle against depression and the other a 20 year battle with addiction... and after some time of victory for both, the demons rose up and won a battle, but not the war.

 I am still grieving those losses.

Through all of this, once again, God, my family, and my school co-workers were gracious. They all saw it was necessary to take a step back and re-tool.

Stepping back from 26 years of coaching and 43 years of continuous football seasons was surreal.

I remember praying, "Lord, what are you planning to do?"

And then I was surprised by a boat.

Day 1- little did I know!

A year earlier, a parent called me and wanted me to become a steward of his dad's bass boat. It was a 17' aluminum, Lowe, bass boat with a 75 Evinrude on it.

To say it need work was an understatement.

These weren't even the right numbers!

And to make matters worse.... I knew very little about boats. I didn't even have a boating license. Even though I had fished all my life, I never drove the boat. I never towed it. I never backed it up. I wasn't even sure how to start it!

A good friend got me started... the boat had not been cranked in a long time and the gas in the fuel tank was very old. So this project tok a long time.

The old gas... tough doing this part- thanks Lance!

But having a summer without coaching prep meant that it was time for me to fulfill my promise to restore this boat.

Every day was a challenge and a joy to accomplish. I spent long hours on you tube and google, looking at how to install marine batteries, on board battery charger, and cleaning old moldy things out of the bowels of this boat.

I had it taken to my garage and opened al of the compartments. My house smelled like a dirty, moldy tennis shoe for weeks. How my wife stayed with me during this time was amazing.

This was when it was STINKY!

God would send help every time I got stuck.

One such time was an old student of mine who allowed me to launch in his lake while we replaced the rotten boards on the trailer.  He helped me grease the bearings.

The trailer minus rotten runners

I put the new tags on the boat and discovered that the serial numbers on the side were incorrect.

I added life jackets, trolling motor, hummingbird navionics, fire extinguisher... each improvement was like a healing.

I passed my boating test. And friends began teaching me how to hook it up, how to tow, how to back up, and how to run it.

It was so exciting learning new skills.

I had my setbacks..... the old trolling motor burned up on the 2nd outing.

The shaft on my starter was sticking... and I celebrated the day I was able to fix it while on the phone with a mechanic, who diagnosed the problem by listening to it on my phone!

I had humbling mistakes as well-- got towed in over a mile only to discover that my kill switch had been disconnected! My boat was dead until I realized I forgot to put the main battery hookup on!

I drove 50 feet or so one day with the trailer wheel down!

And we put the winch strap on the wrong side of the rubber  bow stop while all the waiting boaters were rolling their eyes at us!

But from June to August, I got better and better.

I have now spent two months towing, launching, driving, loading that boat all by myself. I have dome it in daylight and dark.

I have enjoyed fishing... caught a few nice ones even though fishing hasn't been great.... but much more than fishing, I have learned to love boating!

I love to turn on my navigational lights and GPS just before daybreak and running between the Lay Lake Narrows just as the sun is peeking his early rays on the horizon.

Guntersville

And then, as birds are flying at flying at dawn and the peaceful breeze of morning dew splashes my face......

God shows up.

I nod to Him and He nods to me.

And I feel like He has me more ready to follow Him than ever before in my life.

And I have never been more content. I am not addicted to the applause or approval of man.

I still have struggles and one was making sure the boat doesn't become a new idol... God has already been working on that one as well.

So I don't know what the future has in store. I love my job (which is weird for me to say) and I love coaching the fishing team.

Today, I finished a 3 mile run and the neighborhood boys were playing football.

I took some time to teach them a few routes and we played touch football for a few minutes.

It was a lot of fun!

If I am ever a head football coach again, I do know this, I will NOT be afraid. But I can also say, If I am never a football coach again, I will not be discontent...God knows what He is about.

Rebuilding a boat helped to rebuild me.

UPDATE: 2016 SEASON

This boat has been a successful tournament boat- the kids and I are calling it 'Ole Reliable"

Twice, it has had to fill in when another boat hasn't been able to go!

It ran so well each time- going all the way to Pickwick and running almost 60 miles for that whole day.

Personally, I guess I have caught 250+ bass including a 5.4 lb on on Pickwick and a record day for me catching a slew of spotted bass at Logan Martin

Late one Saturday night after a tournament... my wife and I talked... she and I both agreed... I finally am healed from that painful transition... likely, will always have a limp from it... but I am at peace and thankful to the Lord for helping me!

Update 2024- I wrote a song about this post:

He Nods to Me (An Old Boat)