Thursday, June 09, 2011

Conversations With House- Miracle from Princeton-Plainsboro Teaching Hospital

this is a 3rd installment of a fictional 'thought experiment' that I have been having fun with. The premise is that I have reached out to the famous fictional TV character- Dr Greg House. I'm putting this intro in because I had 2 people call me yesterday asking if this was real- I have withheld the names to protect the innocent. By the way, if you haven't watched the show- this will make even less sense.

I don't know if it was my answer or if he was growing bored.

I picked up the cell after it buzzed just after midnight- very early for him.

"Do you believe in evolution?"


It was an awkward pause.


"Because the science is sound. All species because of their genetic make-up and environmental factors undergo slight, successive variations over time."

"Are you reading these answers?"

"No, Dr House- but I am trying to be very careful and succinct when we chat."

"So you say the earth is millions of years old and young earth Christians are morons."

"No sir, I did not say that. To make that statement, you have moved beyond science in my opinion and become speculative- not illogical- but not provable beyond a reasonable doubt."

And then he lost his temper - for real this time. He was speaking so fast, so crude, and skewering me that I was having a hard time keeping up. It's funny- but before he had stung me- yet I was kind of enjoying this  rant.

I now know why- calling me passionless and safe hurt my pride. Calling him unscientific and speculative hurt his.

"Look, Dr House, I'm no scientist- I'm not even a true theologian, but from what I have read, all we can document is change in species within species but there are divided opinions as to whether there is proof of species transformation. Yes, birds beaks grow during long droughts, but they also trend back to average size when the rain returns."

It was the longest I had ever spoken to him without a hang up or cut off.

And next came the most unexpected bombshell, one I could have never guessed.

"I'm changing the game now."

I don't know how long the pause was, but it was riveting. My heart beat was audible in my ear and a surge of endorphins made me take quick crisp breaths.

"You are coming to see me. I am going to put you through a 5 day gauntlet. You will fly out next Thursday, you will stay at the Nassau Inn, and you will return to Alabama on Tuesday evening. And- this is almost a miracle of water and wine significance.... I'm going to cover the expenses myself. Someone from the hospital will call you in the morning to set up travel details. So you are going to at least tell your wife now that you have broken through and will personally proselytize the infamous House." click

What have I done now?

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